Dear Ian

I wish I had...
a camera behind my eyes...

so I could capture endless frames of your sweet face;

Memories to pull out, to examine and exclaim over, to cherish.

A million tiny little pieces of you,

pieces I'm sure to forget.

I wish I had...
a tape recorder in my ears...

to record your sounds when you sleep, when you laugh, when you dream;

Something to listen to later on, when these sounds have faded away.

 A copy of your baby voice, 

before all of our real words drown it out.

I wish I could bottle the smell of your baby-fine hair after your bath,

and your baby milk breath, warm on my neck.

Forever feel the weight of you asleep on my shoulder,

and always see your eyes shine bright and clear as a winter night's sky. 

I wish I could forever capture all of your intoxicating baby-ness,

to have for later, when I will miss it dearly.

I hope I will remember your tiny ways when you are big and strong....

Love, Mom